How to feel a little calmer while life has some challenges.

From the moment I put on my swimming suit, neoprene gloves, hat and boots, I begin to leave my human life for that of a sea-dweller, or even a mermaid.  As I walk towards the beach wrapped in my gigantic robe, I am focused on only one thing, the sea.  I change from living my human life, ensconced mostly in a warm brick house to being part of the natural world.  The sea murmurs quietly today, low winds but with some lingering grey cloud.   It feels colder without the sun rays, and for a moment I wonder why am I here? The water is breathtakingly cold now, only five degrees, which is classed as "ice swimming" (5 ℃ and below) although there is definitely no ice in sight.  Two seagulls watch me with little interest, as they perch on the posts of the groynes and allow me to swim close by.  They accept me as a sea creature for these moments and part of their ocean.  I wonder where this endorphin "high" is or even a sense of  "this is nice" that regular cold water

On the beach this morning, I was clapped by a dog walker who called out "bravo".  I was wearing my enormous blue cosy cape-like robe and had just emerged from a chilly swim in the sea.  I smiled and said thank-you, feeling slightly embarrassed about being clapped for merely swimming.  As I walked back home, I realised my outfit might look rather like an oversized Superwoman, or maybe some kind of "real" athlete.  It is an incredible thing that I can swim in this cold water, in December without freezing and I secretly enjoyed the moment of acknowledgment by the dog walker.  However, what is funny is that swimming in the cold sea is actually not that difficult compared to the relentless endurance needed to get through these pandemic times. Having heard a lot of different stories of people's struggles this year, one thing that is obvious is that each experience is entirely individual.  A GP once told me that the Christmas period can act as a "magnifier"

This is the time of year when I turn into some reptilian, lizard-like sun seeker.  Any moment when there is a clearing in the grey cloud and some rays of sunshine miraculously peep through, I am excited.  Perhaps I have a sun-craving syndrome, as I will grab a coat and get outside as soon as I see the sun appear.  It feels like a tonic and a much needed uplift, especially during this pandemic winter.  Even if it is only 5 degrees outside, as it was today, you will find me wrapped up by the sea for those rare moments of sunshine. If times were normal, I would have a plan to travel to somewhere warm for a few weeks this winter.  The most incredible benefit from taking a break from my teaching career is that I have been able to travel off-peak in early December or January when it is SO cheap in comparison to taking holidays at peak-times.  In the last couple of years, we have escaped to Nerja in Spain which is lovely and quiet in the winter, yet warm enough for both walking and relaxing o